Ugh. HAHAHA! My jaw drop in laughing at this knowing that I am writing up all the shit as an expression. Falling, oh, I mean Feeling. That feeling that equates in being so far from what I usually do. That weird habit that I am not fond of, the feeling that erased my hesitations and pride. HAHAHA. Oh well, had lost every drop of that so called “feeling” or “attraction”, that I am so sure that all I know is that I am still better off, or best would still grow in getting up. But! But! I can’t still answer the question on why. Infatuation? Affection? Nah. rather, “respect” - Respect that you’ve earned by just inflicting that natural attitude, that amazed so big time that I can bow down and surrender on my knees. I can’t even justify why am I writing this up just to say that. I want to be sober again, yes I do. But drowning on your presence (even though it is not that significant yet at all) is so fascinating.
Before I get too high on this hallucination, I’d rather let time pass by, just like on what happened 3 or 4 years ago, everything ended in a snap without knowing on what? why? oh, OK, no big deal. That feeling was so surreal that even I say it didn’t happen, it still haunts me within. HAHAHAHA. Now I know what I really wanted, thanks to YOU. Arigatow! Next stop… knowing how to tame someone like you. :)